The idea of ordering flowers for your wife or girlfriend is generally a good thing. Of course, the first thing that most men know is that you shouldn't order flowers for your lady-friend when you are in the dog house. It's terribly cliché' and generally a lame way to get back on their good side. I tend to try to give flowers periodically when things are great. I find that a random flower gift goes much further than a make-up flower gift.

Let me set the scene for you. You decide that the time is right. You are going to order flowers for the Mrs. You need some brownie points because there is a whole lot of football on TV in the coming weekend. You start to rack your brain for what flowers she likes. Lillies...no. Carnations...no. Dandelions...no. Roses...no. Tulips...yes, Tulips. You go to the Yellow Pages and look up florists. You look for the most "man friendly" add you can find (pictures and big numbers). You dial up the florist and they pick up. You tell the florist that you want to send flowers to your wife. You are feeling pretty good. The florist makes some complimentary comments on how thoughtful you are, and you really feel like you are on to something. Then out of the blue, the florist hits you with the worst phrase a man can hear, "what would you like the card to say".  Here we go....judgment time. You can ruin this whole deal with the wrong words. You can't say what you mean because "I hope I can have six hours to myself to watch football this weekend" would sound awkward. It would be bad enough if you had to handwrite the card, but you actually have to speak your remedial prose to someone on the other end of the phone. It's bad if the other person is a woman, it is an absolute disaster if the other person is a man. You start, "Thank...you...for...No scratch that.  You are...the reason...I...No scratch that. Just put I love you. Love, Peter."
Good intentions were the motivation. It was painful along the way, but the end result is still great.

There is absolutely no financial moral to this story. It's just part of the everyday torture that men go through. I just think that understanding how men and women think differently is a major key to opening the lines of communication. Per my book (referencing your own book is both empowering and psychotic) communication is one of the three keys to budgeting success. The other two being awareness and accoutability. As you can see, if it is hard for a man to tell a florist what to write on a card, then it is absolutely difficult for a man to communicate effectively in a family budget meeting. But, that is why we are trying to work on this together.

Check out www.petetheplanner.com for our new marketing video. You can email it to a friend or enemy. We want people to understand how we advise, and how laid back proper money management can be. I welcome your feedback.