Sensitive Topic Alert!!!

Without a doubt the most controversial topic that I cover in my book is the concept of having only one checking account per married couple. I realize that there are absolutely no absolutes in this world, but I still find that married people that have separate checking accounts are destined for trouble.

I realize that in a dual income relationship that people have a right to spend the money that they earn, but this same God-given right causes a majority of the problems. Marriage is about cooperation and partnership, so I don't see how using money separately really cultivates the spirit of marriage. I do agree that each spouse needs some money allocated to them to use at their own discretion, but anything beyond that is generally the start of a trust or greed issue.

I even had a person come up to me at my book launch party to discuss this very topic.  The conversation went like this,"Peter, congrats on you new book, but I think that you are telling people bad information about separate checking accounts."

"Thanks, I'm sorry you feel that way. Please have another free drink", I offered.

The person went on to explain that they had just gone through a divorce, and that they didn't have their own separate investments. This was an especially bad thing for them because they said that their spouse mishandled the money, and left this person high and dry. While I certainly agree that the story was tragic, I also realize that I can't advise people to have their finances separate in the event that they divorce. In fact, there is no way that I will ever advise anyone of anything that makes the assumption that the marriage won't last. I flat out refuse to do it. The purpose of my money and marriage message is to help improve peoples' marriages, not give them a financial out.

The solution to this problem is to get both parties involved. Make decisions together. It doesn't matter that one person doesn't like dealing with money. Money dealings are some of the best marriage building exercises that one can do. Work through the little money problems now, or the big money and marriage problems will be your downfall.